Crayola
by KISAFREEDOMNESS
Summary: A splash of color on a blank page. An AU Namiku fic by Kyou.


Disclaimer: All Kingdom Hearts characters, Crayola, and The Academy Is… are not owned my me. Unfortunately. :P

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

They turn their backs on me and hold their silly little conversations. It's like I'm not even there. It's torture, but it's better than being laughed at.

"Anything's better than that, right?" 

I asked her about it, of course. If I told anyone, it'd be her.

"I guess so."

**"I mean, that's just mean." **

"It's no big deal."

_"Has it happened enough?"_

"I guess."

"**Does** anyone **know**?"

"Just you. And them, of course."

Silence. Then-

"_Why_ don't _you _say _anything_? If _you_ want, _I_ can _talk_ to _them..."_

"I can't. And please don't. You'll make it worse."

"I don't understand."

"You wouldn't."

"**Why** _not_?"

"You're one of them."

"_Wh_- what's _that_ supposed _to_ mean!? _I_ could _understand_ if _you_ just _told_ me!"   
"No, you wouldn't.

"**Try **me."

"You can't change."

"And why not?!"

"_They_ never change."

Of course, this is true. She has nothing to say to that.

Pity.

She could've been a friend.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

I believe it started with school. The first day, of course, was short. It was nothing but disappointment. I knew no one in my classes. I already knew from that short time that I was there that this was not my year. I could easily spot the cliques- the populars, the loners, the wannabes, the jocks. It was simple as that- they stayed in their groups and didn't break apart. But where did I belong?

The populars… they consisted of four girls. Kairi, Naminé, Olette, Selphie. I actually used to be friends with Kairi, believe it or not. We were next door neighbors. We used to run to the park together and eat ice cream. Then she met Selphie. Selphie was essentially nice enough, but we had our differences and I eventually became uncomfortable whenever she came near me. THAT'S how different we were.

Along with Selphie came Olette and Naminé. They were never explicitly mean to me- they just… weren't my friends. Sometimes they even acted like I wasn't there. Sometimes they laughed at me in the hallways as I fumbled with my books. But the absolute worst was when they stared. They would just stare and whisper. I don't think they even noticed that they were doing it. Or maybe they did, and they didn't know that I knew. Whatever the case, that was the worst. When I close my eyes, I can still see the pairs of green and blue eyes looking at me.

I probably could have at least TRIED to be popular. I could've been a jock. I was athletic enough, but it just wasn't in my best interest to run around chasing a rubber ball. Really, what was the point when I could be spending my time doing something else?  
What I'm trying to say is that I knew my place. I would simply watch them (NEVER talked to them- it was unheard of), and they wouldn't notice. Or maybe they were just used to being stared at. Whichever it was, they pretended (or maybe they really believed) that I didn't exist and went on with their merry lives. And I was fine with it. No, really. I was.

…okay, maybe it was a LITTLE lonely. I mean, come ON. I had no friends. You'd care, too!

Anyways, my point is was that we went on our separate ways and never met.

That is, we DID until Naminé showed up in my life.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

"Are you lonely?"

I still remember her first words to me. They were what I would now call Vivid Violet.

"What?!"

"I asked if you were lonely."

That was all she said.

"Why?"

"Answer me first." I sighed.

"No, I'm not lonely." She laughed rather harshly.

"Liar," she scoffed. I shrugged and walked away. But her words haunted me throughout the day.

_"Are you lonely?" _I didn't THINK I was. I hadn't really thought about it until then.

Maybe I WAS a _little _lonely. But what did it matter? I had friends, right?

But _THAT _was a lie, of course.

Sora hung out with the athletes, and Kairi (of course) stayed with the populars. But who did I hang with? I'll tell you who: no one. I had no friends.

I really _was _alone.

I shrugged off this newfound information and continued to walk home. It was a four-day weekend, and I wasn't about to let some girl get in the way of my gaming marathon. I mean, _really. _I'd been fine without friends before. Why should I let this stop me?

So I didn't let it bother me and forgot about it totally until Tuesday after school.

"Are you ready to tell me the truth?"

"What?" She walked off a few steps, and then turned around. I realized she wanted me to follow her. "Oh." I ran after her. I have to admit, I was a little intrigued.

_Just _a little.

I followed her to the back of the school.

"You probably already know who I am."

"Right. Naminé," I said coolly.

"And you're… Riku, mm?" I was a little surprised at that.

"…how do you know me?"

"Kairi used to talk about you," she said simply.

_Used _to talk about me. Hunh. I sighed a little at that. "Right."

"Who are your friends?" I shrugged.

"I dunno." She scowled.

"Oh, come ON. Who are your friends?"  
"I have no friends."

"That can't be true."

"It is."

She was quiet. "Why? Why don't you have friends?"

"No one likes me."

"That's not true. Not at all."

"They just like me because I'm smart."

"And because you're a 'pretty boy'. A dorky one," she giggled.

"You're not helping," I growled.

"Well, it's true," she sighed. I shook my head.

"Right." She shrugged.

"I gotta go. Talk to you later."

"Kay. Bye."

"See you tomorrow."

"What, really!?"

"What?"

"You really want to talk to me again?" She made a face.

"Sure, why not?" I shrugged.

"Whatever."

"Bye." I waved my farewell and watched her walk away.

Hunh.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

The next day she invited me to sit with the populars at lunch. I, of course, declined. I didn't belong there, I explained. She made that face again and walked away for a moment before returning with her lunch.

"What?"

"I'm going to eat with you."

"Seriously!?"

"Sure, why not?"

We walked outside past the populars' sneers, past the jocks catcalls, past everyone's disapproving eyes. What did it matter whom I sat with at lunch, anyway?

Apparently it DID matter. But that's later.

Anywho, I followed her to a grassy (_mountain meadow)_ spot under a tree. It was a warm day, and there were squirrels _(fuzzy wuzzy brown)_ running around.

"So."

"So?"

"What did you want to talk about?" She shrugged.

"Dunno," she said through a mouthful of pasta salad. "Just wanted to talk."

"Why?"

"Must you _always _ask questions?"

"Of course." She sighed in exasperation, but she didn't leave.

"Fine," she said. "I dunno. That first day that I saw you, you just seemed interesting, and you were lonely, is all. And it's nice to talk to someone aside from the girls, you know?"

"Are you talking to me out of pity?" I groaned. I hated when people did that.

"I dunno," she grinned. "Maybe. I don't think so." I nodded.

"All right. Sure. Whatever."

"No, really!"

"I know. It's fine if you are."

Silence.

I cleared my throat. "It's… lunch is over."  
"I know."

"You're not going in?"

"No."

"You're just gonna… skip class?"

"Sure. Wouldn't be the first time."

I gaped at her. I couldn't even _think _about skipping class, _EVER. _

"Um… I'm gonna go now."

"Bye."

And that was that. I went inside, and she stayed out. I guess her grades really didn't matter to her. I mean, she wasn't the one being pressured to go to the best colleges, to get the best grades, right?

Either way, I looked for her after class (don't ask me why- I don't really know myself) and she was gone. I simply shrugged and went on with life. I mean, I had homework to do. I couldn't hang around looking for her all day.

She wasn't there the next morning.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Or the next.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

After she still didn't show up on Monday, I started getting anxious. Where was she? Was she okay? Why didn't she come back already? I didn't know what to do. She hadn't given me a number or address, and her "friends" didn't look too worried, so I supposed _they _weren't going to help me. And even if I _did _have an address, what would I have done? It's not like I could just _barge_ in on her home or something. Heh. That sort of stuff belonged in sappy chick flicks _(cotton candy)_, seriously. I just didn't **do** that sort of thing. It was an ill-fated plan ever since I had thought of it, and it'd never have a chance to fly. Poor thing.

But I still had a problem and _no solution. _I needed help from_ someone_, and the first people I thought of were her friends. Who WERE her friends, anyway? I made a mental list- in alphabetical order, to boot. Eat your heart out, Mr. I'm-Smarter-Than-You AKA_ Zexion_. Urr, right. _Axel, Demyx, Hayner, Kairi, Olette, Pence, Roxas, Selphie, Sora. _Um… and several other guys that she had probably all dated at one point in her life. Peh.

Anyways, it's not like they'd help me either. So what was I to do? I waited. And waited. I waited all through class and lunch and even MORE class. Even Classic Literature, my favorite subject, felt dull that day. As soon as the bell rang, I was out of there. I went home and thought about what I should do while I finished my calculus homework when my cell phone rang. What the hell? Nobody ever called me, partially because no one knew my number… but that's beside the point.

"Hello?"

"Are you Riku?" Talk about creepy. All those horror/stalker _(shadow) _movies came flooding back to me. Great.

"Um, yes…? Who is this?"

"What did you do with Naminé?" _What?!_

"What did_ I_ do with Naminé?"

"I'm talking to you, aren't I?"

"Okay, who is this?! I didn't do anything with Naminé! I barely _know _her!" That was only _half_ a lie, anyways.

"The last time we saw her was with you." That's right… she skipped class that day. I'd almost forgotten.

"I… she skipped class. I didn't see her."

"Hunh."

And that was it. The mysterious caller hung up.

"Hurry up and come back, Naminé," I muttered. "Before my days get even weirder."

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

The next day Naminé showed up for school. She had apparently forgotten to tell her friends she went on a five-day cruise to Aruba. Right.

Her friends continued to shoot disapproving glances my way, but the weird phone calls stopped. My cell phone continued to collect dust in a corner of my desk.

"Where'd you go?"  
"Didn't you hear me? I was in Aruba."

"Really."

"It's true." I sighed. I apparently wasn't going to get more information from her.

"Fine. Bye."

"Wait!"  
"What?"

"Do you have any more friends?"

"No. It's_ worse_ now."

"What do you mean?"

So I told her about the stares and the rumors and the phone calls and everything else.

"Anything's better than being laughed at, right?"

"I guess so."

"I mean, that's just mean."

"It's no big deal."

"Has it happened enough?"

"I guess."

"Does anyone know?"

"Just you. And them, of course."

"Why don't you say anything? If you want, I can talk to them..."

"I can't. And please don't. You'll make it worse."

"I don't understand."

"You wouldn't."

"Why not?"

"You're one of them."

"Wh- what's that supposed to mean!? I could understand if you just told me!"  
"No, you wouldn't.

"Try me."

"You can't change."

"And why not?!"

"_They_ never change."

And that's where I am now. Alone. Friendless. And now I don't even have anyone to talk to. Just _peachy. _

So it was a complete shock when Kairi approached me during phys. ed.

"What?"

"You know _what_."

"I'm afraid I _don't_."

"Naminé. What did- " I finally snapped. I couldn't help it.

"For the _last freaking time_! I didn't DO anything!"

"Then_ why_ is she so sad?! Huh? Answer _that_, smart one!"

"What… do you mean?"  
"She won't talk to us! She just draws and eats!"

"Uh, isn't that _normal_ for her?"

"She usually _talks_ while she draws, but now she won't even do that. So it's obviously _your_ fault." I shook my head.

"I don't see how." Kairi gave me an uncharacteristically furious glare.

"God, you're _dense_." And that's all. She stormed off after that.

I thought about what she had said. Dense? How was _I_, of all people, _dense_? I mean, come ON. Really. Me, dense? Puh-_leeze_.

But it still bothered me. Was it really my fault? I had thought her friends to be uncaring, but they obviously knew Naminé better than I did. Hah. And to think, I had thought of myself as her friend. I didn't even notice how quiet she had become after I spoke to her. How careless I had been! I really _had _hurt her!

I resolved to apologize the very next morning.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Unfortunately, she was now surrounded by a pack of populars 24/7.

"What do you want, dork?" someone sneered. I couldn't tell- I was too perturbed at the time.

But it was obvious I wasn't going to be able to talk to her. The best I could do was try to send a telepathic message to her- which wasn't the most foolproof plan to begin with.

_I'm sorry, _I thought. I looked up at her and walked away. I hadn't realized what a clear blue her eyes were. They reminded me of when I used to play with crayons as a child. Robin's Egg Blue, it was called.

I wished I could call her or send her a letter or an e-mail and tell her I was sorry. I didn't know which locker was hers, so I couldn't even slip her a note. I could just hope she heard me, and wait.

It was a sad realization.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

She approached me rather warily on Friday, not unlike a dog who has been abused approaching a new owner.

"You got my message, then?" I said a bit too cheerily.

"What?!" I sighed.

"Never mind." Silence. "So." She stared at me.

"Well?" I finally remembered what I was here for.

"I'm sorry." She nodded.

"Good." She started to walk away.

"Where are you going?"

"Class."

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

I wondered if she'd ever speak to me again. Not just 'hi' and 'bye', but how we used to talk. Hah. As if I'd talked to her long enough to have a "used to".

But I felt terrible. If it had a crayon, it'd be Cadet Blue. You know, that color that looks blue in the package, but when you actually use it, it's gray. (I never did understand why that happened.)

I guess I had just really liked having a friend, having something to look forward to the next day besides classes. It was a comfortable feeling- eh, I'd call it Electric Lime.

She brought color to my monochrome life.

I had to get that back.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

"Naminé!" She swiveled around.

"Riku."

"Listen, what I said earlier… I really am sorry."

She looked at me _(Robin's Egg Blue eyes) _and shook her head. "It's fine."

But I wouldn't let her get away this time.

"If it was fine, you'd talk to me." She looked slightly offended.

"I talk to you. I'm talking to you right now, aren't I?"

"Not like that. You know what I mean. How you talked to me the first day."

"I can't do that."

"Why?"

"Because I'm only your friend." It's like that song. _When it all comes crashing-_

"When will you talk to me, then!?" She merely shrugged, her face the lightest shade of pink. Carnation Pink. "What, would you talk to me as- as- I don't know, as-"

_-down. _

"Your girlfriend." Clear, hopeful color, scribbled onto the canvas.

"What… you say…" My voice caught in my throat.

"I did tell you. Subtly. You didn't listen." Did she? Maybe she did. I don't remember. But the picture is being drawn. I see the colors- Apricot, Bittersweet, Blue Green. I wonder who is drawing. "Please?"

I realized why I looked for her, that day after school. Why I was concerned about her disappearance. Why it was so easy to talk to her.

I realized who the artist was.

"I love you, Riku." Naminé. Carefully choosing colors. Silver, Turquoise Blue, Maize.

And Robin's Egg Blue, of course.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Now I describe everything in color. It's beautiful. She's beautiful. I proudly tell everyone the story of how the artist splashed color on the blank page.

Because she loves me, and I her.

She gave me colored crayons for my birthday. I carry them with me wherever I go.

So even if she's not there, she's with me all the time.

A splash of color in my life.

_This is all there is to be told- until we meet again. _

Author's Note: Ah, I had fun writing this. x I hope you enjoy it as much as I did while creating it. I hope the story's not too confusing. The colors in the story are actual Crayola Crayon names. And the song he talks about at the end is called We've Got a Big Mess On Our Hands by The Academy Is… and it's a great song. :D If you like this story, PLEASE REVIEW FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY AND SACRED. xD Thank you for reading. Love. 3


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